GRUNGE; ROCK THE WORLD

Sunday, September 27, 2009

She sat in silence, feeling his presence behind her.

Who was he? Who was he to her? Just a friend? Just another boy?

She was confused. Though she knew that they could never be more than "just"s, she couldn't help wonder "what if...?". She knew that overthinking things was definately not a good idea. She knew he didn't really like her; it was just desperate lust. She knew that, and was smart enough to remember that. She knew that she couldn't ever get emotionally involved with someone like him; they were just too different.

And yet, everyday she sees more sides of him. She learnt his laughs, she memorised his touch, gosh, she even knew his smell. But she knew, she knew he wasn't so one dimentional. Many things about him, she liked. Others, she could even hate. So she knew, with all her heart, that they could never be, not just because the hate was a big enough deterant, but because there was more. She was complex, he was simple. They were on completely different levels.

However, the saddest thing of all was that she could never give him up. Why was that? Was it just because he paid attention to her? Was it just because she liked the way he smiled at her or the way his laugh made her laugh? Was it just because she knew he wanted her? No. No, she didn't think it was just that. It was because that he had sides that she couldn't abandon. Sides she couldn't walk away from. The vulnerability in his eyes, the sincerity in his touch, even the things he did just to be close to her. They made her smile.

But reality is cruel. Reality is not pretty. She could love him and detest him within the span of mere seconds. He could be an asshole. He could be real stupid. He could even be cruel. But the other sides of him kept pulling her back, making her snap back like an elastic band. It was like the turn of a magnet. One minute they could repel each other, the next they could be hopelessly drawn to one another. It was irritating. It was frustrating. It was nervewrecking.

But what could she do? What can she do? The cycle will always repeat itself. The wheel will just keep on turning with no say from her whatsoever.

Sigh... She sighs.

posted @ 11:13 PM |